Life Coaching: When You’re Just Not Feeling It

One of the byproducts of widowhood has been difficulty sleeping. Whether I go to bed at a decent hour, or wait until 2:00 a.m., it makes no difference. If it’s gonna be one of “those” nights, it’s gonna be one of “those” nights and there’s nothing I can do about it. I’ve tried medication. I’ve tried lavender. I’ve tried wine and whiskey. Nothing works for very long. Haven’t tried cigarettes yet, but that seems to go along with wine and whiskey on some visceral level and I just thought I’d throw that in for good measure…

I wouldn’t mind the sleepless nights so much if it wasn’t for the mornings after. The mornings after are pure, unadulterated, miserable creatures from the pit of hell. My hair is sticking up all over my head, my sheets are askew, Trixie is befuddled, my eyes look like I’ve went 10 rounds with Tyson, and my body is just simply TIRED! I am just not feeling it.

Those moments come to us all—moments of sheer exhaustion, whether a result of physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, or financial stress, We all have times when we are just not feeling it. We want to lay down and just be left alone until the moment (or day, week, month, year) passes, and we don’t feel good about ourselves for even thinking that. We Christians are supposed to be world overcomers, and the there are always people around to remind us of that fact. Well, sometimes we just don’t want to hear it, so leave us alone!

Ok, so now that the previous statement has your attention, what on earth do we do about it when we feel like that? First of all, if we’re physically exhausted, we need to rest. If we’re mentally exhausted, we need to rest. If we’re emotionally, exhausted, we need to REST! You get the idea…Rest is key to recovering our balance, in every aspect of our lives. We have to rest. Even if we can’t sleep, rest is still beneficial. We can shut off our minds and just rest quietly and recharge.

Secondly, we can educate ourselves to the nature of our complaint. Google is my best friend with it comes to information. Today, I googled three things before I even got out of bed! When you educate yourself, you discover the nature of your complaint (or malaise, whichever word works for you), and it helps to muddle our way through the pit of despair, as they say in “The Princess Bride.” And for all you fans out there, it drags us back from the “cliffs of insanity.”

Thirdly, we can do something productive. Volunteer at a halfway house, take a meal to a sick friend, help a neighbor plant a tree—but do SOMETHING! If sleeplessness is the problem, get up and do something. I’m not saying to work out like a mad dog at 3:00 a.m., but if we’re awake anyway, it’s a good time to work on those emails, crochet a hat, write greeting cards, anything to get our minds off the ever elusive SLEEP! I sometimes find something to read. A book, remember those? Electronic devices can really hinder sleep, but a good old fashioned book can lull the brain right off into golden slumbers.

Lastly, pray. Pray hard. Even if we don’t feel like it, prayer is the most effective way to get our hearts and minds tuned into God. We may not feel like it, but this is the time when the rubber hits the road. This is the time to ask ourselves, do we believe? Prayer is not a feeling. Prayer is a spiritual disciple we exercise to communicate with the One we love. Our relationships with our families and friends aren’t always perfect. Neither is our relationship with God. Notice I said OUR relationship with God, NOT His relationship with us! His relationship with us is perfect. He has no need to crucify His flesh, He has already done so. WE are the ones who need that! So, bend that knee and pray, even when It hurts. Even when we just don’t feel like it. Doing things we don’t enjoy is part of life, , and, in this instance, it’s vital to our spirits.

Today, I’m just not feeling it. But I’m gonna press on in toward the upward call of Christ, as I am instructed to do in Gods Word. Because my feelings have nothing to do with my actions. My feelings are feelings only. The world doesn’t rise and fall on my feelings, doggone it, no matter how much I might wish that to be the case. There are, of course, times to consider how we feel, but keep this in mind…not feeling like being a Christian today is not an option. I can’t ask my sister to hold my Jesus for me for a day. Heavy burdens are not ours to bear. His yoke is easy. his burden is light. We place the heaviness on ourselves because of the cares of this world. Keep your hope alive.