Tender Mercies and the Hallmark Channel

Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.
Colossians 3:12

This verse is a “God-wink” moment, as they say on the Hallmark Channel. Yes, I am a fan of those mindless, sappy films. I installed an app on my TV just so I can watch Christmas movies continuously from Halloween to New Years. I would never make a living as a movie critic, because I detest relevant little pieces by indy producers about teenage angst or left feet (sorry, Daniel Day-Lewis, you hyphenated curmudgeon). I like movies that entertain and nothing bad happens to the people in them...In short, I like tenderhearted movies...Movies where dogs go to heaven, Bill Murray repeats Groundhog Day, and Dolly Parton ties Dabney Coleman to his chair. Ok, maybe that last one wasn’t so tenderhearted, but...Dolly Parton, y’all!!!

What does it mean to be tender hearted? Webster defines it as “being easily moved to love, pity, or sorrow.” There are many benefits to being tenderhearted; there is also one major downfall—you get hurt easily. I am going to leave that as a discussion for another day and approach this from the opposite angle. How tenderhearted are we towards others? How compassionate are we? Do we take a moment to think about where others are coming from or do we immediately go on the defensive and react like it’s third and ten and we are going for a first down? I am posting a picture of me today when I was just a young whippersnapper. I am four years old, and all I wanted for Christmas was a football helmet. I have this picture sitting on my nightstand to remind me to never lose my quirky spirit. It reminds me I was once young, vulnerable and tenderhearted. A million tomorrows were in that young child’s heart that Christmas. I didn’t know one single thing about life. I didn’t envision the slapping around that was going to take place over the next half a century plus of my life. I didn’t know how many times I would be called on to exercise tender mercies to my fellow brothers and sisters. Nor did I realize just how many times I would fail to grant said mercies to those who were really in need because I was too busy, too stressed, or didn’t want to be bothered. Life is actually NOT a Hallmark Movie. In real life, there is pain, suffering, sickness, hurting, death. Where are the tender mercies then?

One thing I have discovered is that God does not comfort us in order for us to be comfortable. He comforts us so we can be a comfort to others. In fact, I really don’t think God cares if we are uncomfortable. I’ll go a step further and say I don’t think God minds MAKING us uncomfortable if that’s what it takes to get our attention.

Here’s the thing—we really don’t know the entirety of other peoples stories. We don’t know what causes Johnny to cry or Susie to be mute. We just don’t know. Even if we ask, we have no way of knowing what impact pain and suffering has on a persons mind, spirit and soul. Some seem to bounce back with disgusting regularity, ever the perpetual cheerleader (ok, I may or may not be a Tigger instead of an Eeyore). Others get depressed. Still others close themselves off. But no matter which category we fall into, we all have one thing in common—we all need tenderhearted mercy, kindness, love and compassion. Ultimately, that takes the form of Jesus. But if we are to be His disciples, shouldn’t we show the same mercy? This is one of the most difficult struggles in the Christians journey, in my opinion, because when we get hurt, our initial reaction is often to retaliate in kind. We get offended, we strike back. We get angry, we explode. We get bruised, we gossip. We get devastated, we wreak havoc. In other words, we act like humans. I am submitting this today for your consideration—As Christians, do we have the right to strike back in kind when we are wronged? An “eye for an eye” is simply not a Biblical concept. I’m not talking about being weak, or letting someone stomp all over you. Jesus was far from that kind of person. He was bold, courageous, and strong. But while he operates with those attributes, He is also meek, humble, compassionate, kind, tender, moved by our pain.

In our anger, we do not have the right to sin, nor do we have the right to injure others. Rather, we take our fears, pains, failures, and troubles to God and let Him heal us. This isn’t always an easy task. The devil will make certain we get hurt. He will do his dead level best to harm us, both physically and spiritually. I know this from personal experience, as most of us do. But if we take a few moments (or longer) to pray for our brother or sister who has hurt us, then we are truly acting like disciples.

Ok, so my southern is coming out again, y’all...I will freely admit this is the LAST thing I want to do. Most of the time, I am poised like a panther, ready to pounce (well, since I’m not really very panther-like, I’ll say I’m poised like a small marmoset ready to viciously gnaw the ears off a chocolate bunny.) In other words, I am not kind, tenderhearted, merciful, or compassionate. I am ready to open a can of carbonated beverage and spray it all over them. But when I react like that, the devil wins. Every.single.time.

But we have the ability to change our reactions, thank God! We have the ability to love others, curb our tempers, capture our thoughts and communicate our feelings in a controlled and humble manner. Isn’t humanity wonderful sometimes? We have the ability to make choices—good ones or bad ones. We can choose tender mercies, compassion, love, hope, joy and peace. Mercy and tenderness are all choices we can choose to make. Or not. Love is not merely a feeling. It’s a choice we make every day to either include or exclude it from our lives. We can turn toward love or away from it. We can choose love and mercy. We can show mercy for the lovable and the unlovable.

I have to go now. I am going to put on my football helmet and find a Hallmark movie with the word “Christmas” in it. I am choosing to love today. I am choosing tenderhearted mercy toward my brothers and sisters. I am soothing the marmoset by feeding it chocolate.

God bless! Maranatha!